Two Feelings at Once

By the way you look and by the way you talk

I would just sit there and look at you

but I pretend to look at the clock.

When you glance at me

my heart stops,

thinking that you are looking right at me,

but I look away to make sure you don’t catch my eyes,

I don’t think you notice me,

I  don’t think you even know

I exist.

My shyness stops me from talking to you,

maybe I should stop my heart for a moment

because I don’t want to end up broken.


I want something new

and I want it to be true.

I tried stepping forward,

but I keep  on looking back.

I want to let the pain go away

and start everything again.

I don’t want to keep on falling

for your words

that comes out from your mouth.

I don’t want to play your same old game;

You know this is an uncontrolled pain.